Infinite Choices

Peace....

2008-06-08T06:58:00.003-07:00

Inspiration came to me today from my inbox from my daily email update from the A.R.E

Think on This .... . peace must begin within self before there may be the activity or the application of self in such a manner as to bring peace in thy own household, in thine own heart, in thine own vicinity, in thine own state or nation. Edgar Cayce Reading 3976-28

As a follow up to the political changes and Rebecca Walker's comments, isn't this what we truly desire? Beautiful thoughts to start the day.

Choices and Hillary Rodham Clinton

2008-06-07T19:08:00.003-07:00

As I mentioned in my last blog, I was discouraged Hillary Rodham Clinton would not be nominated as the Democratic Candidate for President. I heard some positive comments on NPR regarding how Hillary needs to decompress from the stress of the campaign and reflect on her experience.

I doubted it as I listened, but tried to be optimistic. Although I never believed I subscribed to blatant feminine gender bias, I understand how it could easily be viewed that way. My attempt to help girls and women see infinite possibilities and infinite choices could be misconstrued. I just want to emphasize that intelligence, wisdom, inner beauty and grace are incredibly more important than choosing the Britney Spears/Paris Hilton way to fame.

The same day my daughter sent me a link to Rebecca Walker's commentary Best woman for the job could be a man. Rebecca's perspective is truly honorable. Two lines stood out to me.

The first is: It is time to turn the page on myopic gender-based Feminism and concede that while patriarchy is real, so is female greed, dishonesty and corruptibility. It's time to empower the feminisms embodied by millions of women and men who care about everyone, including, but not limited to, women.

The second is: I spoke at Harvard a few years ago on the necessity of ending divisiveness and relying more on the human capacity for openness as a baseline for true progress. This position is necessary not only in feminist circles, but in the primal fight or flight mechanism of our own minds. Visit http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/06/06/walker/index.html?eref=rss_latest for more powerful and transformative thoughts.

Like Hillary or not, she has demonstrated what a strong woman can be. Many thought we would not hear much from Al Gore after he lost the election in 2000 and he proved them wrong. Now Hillary has infinite choices as to what she wants to do next. Ending divisiveness might just be on her agenda.

Hung Up on Boom!

2008-06-04T19:30:00.005-07:00

Remember the 1960's? I do. Traumatic events, war and great music. Three major networks on television offered a limited selection of broadcast opportunities. The pill was part of the change which meant more choices for women...it was just the beginning.

I lived through the 60s and the film clips of Woodstock, the Beatles, Martin Luther King are embedded in the minds of those born in the 70s, 80s and 90s, too. I believed I understood it.

Until I got hung up on Boom! Voices of the Sixties Personal Reflections on the 60s and Today by Tom Brokaw. Brokaw interviews the famous, infamous and not so famous about their life in the 60s. And, how much does the revolution of a generation impact us today?

Test your 60s knowledge on Brokaw's quiz yourself at http://www.randomhouse.com/rhpg/brokaw/. There are so many aspects of the 60s of which I was unaware, I believe this book should be required reading for all high school students. Yes, it is powerful and enlightening. Especially for young women.

The perspective of time helps us understand life better. In particular, as Hillary Rodham Clinton will not be the Democratic nominee for the Presidency and the first woman in that role, it is fascinating to realize just how far women have not come since the first time one heard of feminists. Feminism has never been a regular part of my vocabulary, I prefer to strive for equality for every individual.

However, women need to understand the incredible power they have to create their own lives. Not for the short term, but for a lifetime. This book can be the inspiration to help a new generation experience the idealism of the 60s from the perspective of our country in 2008. A country still at war, still seeking equality for individuals, and still without comforting answers to those who expected more revolutionary change.

How did we get here? Read Boom and find out. http://www.randomhouse.com/rhpg/brokaw/

Sage-ing....while age-ing

2008-01-17T19:26:00.000-07:00

Strong women. You have to admire them whether you agree with them or not. Shirley MacLaine is one of those women.

I can remember the late 1960s when Shirley starred in her television series Shirley's World. The short lived television series made me aware of her as an actress and I subsequently watched movies like The Apartment and The Yellow Rolls Royce when I was still quite young.

I have always liked her so I admit I am biased. Then, when I heard she wrote a book involving reincarnation, I was ready to read.

Over the past 30 years, Shirley has written many books. She covers topics about which everyone should educate themselves. She is bold and, as her most famous book says, she is not afraid to go out on a limb.

Whether you see eye to eye with Shirley on reincarnation, extra-terrestrials, Hollywood or not, her wisdom and experience offer a perspective all women need to consider. As a successful and beautiful person, Shirley continues to mentor all of us. And, who among us could not borrow some great ideas and counsel from a fabulously successful woman? Welcome to Shirley's World.

Interview with NAWW

2007-11-16T19:44:00.000-07:00

After a hectic work week, I was delighted to find my interview posted on the National Association of Women Writers web site. Check it out at the link below:

http://naww.org/blog/naww-member-interview-anna-bartkowski

Women Writers and Young Girls

2007-09-28T18:34:00.000-07:00

As a member of the National Women's Writer group and the local Scottsdale Arizona chapter, I have access to some of the most intelligent, articulate and outstanding women in the country.

At our monthly meeting Wednesday night, the issue of women's empowerment dominated the conversation. Thanks to our speaker, Patricia Drain, even 40, 50 and 60 year old women have a lot to learn about what to do next in their careers. Check out her platform at http://www.patriciadrain.com/

Many of the women at the meeting grew up and were grateful to Gloria Steinem for raising women's issues and opening the doors for us. We have so much for which to be grateful. Yet when I mention Gloria Steinem to the younger generation, they say who? I find myself answering, "Christian Bale's stepmother." I hate that answer.

I also know young girls today still fall for the same lines boys have said over the decades, i.e. "you are the only one," or "I won't tell anyone." These vulnerable girls get involved in sex as they are searching for love. Boys get involved the the game of love as they search for sex. Photos can be the next step. Again, these girls think this is normal behavior. Sex today is taken for granted and the exchange of partners a the local high school would make your head spin. Boys relish stealing virginity and keep a count so they can impress their friends. Pictures of And, I am not talking about Hollywood High school, I am talking about the school right down the block from you.

In the last hundred years, social propriety forced pregnant girls to "go away" to have their child. There was no pill or abortion easily available to change the scenario. I do not recommend reverting to those times even if these repercussions kept some casual sex at bay. Girls today need to know the history of sex before they indulge.

Mothers, friends, aunts, sisters, please share your wealth of experience and have regular, open discussions with your daughters. Is it difficult? If they are already in their teens, it may be difficult to find the right words and the right time. But, you need to try. It is a huge problem to overcome because the guidance you give them will not help them to achieve social popularity. But, it is a crucial way to build self esteem and help girls make the best choice.

What do you have to lose? We know sex with a loving relationship is fabulous. Unfortunately, how many teenage boys do you know who are ready for a loving, long-term relationship? We all want grandchildren, but not until our children are ready, willing and financially able to raise them on their own. How many teenage girls do you know who are ready for a loving, long-term relationship? Until they are ready, we need to help our daughters build self esteem. If they don't take your word for it, ask them to check with your sisters, your aunts, or a women mentor for advice. Women need to help women gain perspective. What is critical to a a sophomore in high school will change quickly over the next few years. Let's help our girls through it. They have choices. Sometimes the best choice is simply, "No."

Why Infinite Choices?

2007-09-16T10:36:00.000-07:00

The purpose of this blog is to discuss women and womens' choices. Despite year's of choices and opportunity, I can hardly fathom some of the choices women, in particular young women, make. As mother of two young women who have made excellent choices for themselves, I see the issues they are up against. This blog will be my opportunity to focus on the best choices and show options to young women who think they have to comply to some fashionable or exploitive standard to succeed.

Case in point. Britney Spears. I am not here to bash her. She has done enough of it to herself. However, I wholeheartedly agree with Linda Valdez of the Arizona Republic. Her article in today's newspaper hits the nail on the head. Valdez thanks Britney for her example. Valdez says, "By crashing so completely, you showed the real consequence of buying into the popular-culture image of young women as whores."

The popular sexual sell out of young women can create huge bank accounts, but at what cost? Is money so valuable that any sense of decency must be sacrificed? Are any of these women happy? Britney certainly isn't.

Britney needs to work herself out of this siutation. I doubt she has the intelligence or insight to talk to young women about how artificial her lifestyle is. Maybe in 20 years, will she see it?

My true hope is that young women in middle school, high school and college gain the strength and fortitude to pursue real dreams. Dreams of real jobs pursuing noble goals and raising phenomenal children. That is truly what makes life incredibly successful and gratifying.

Reach for and create a real world for yourself. In the words of David Morrell who I heard yesterday, "Be a first rate version of yourself, not a second rate version of someone else." And, to that I add, or a version of what you think someone else wants you to be.